Tag: Critiques

This is the same night as the last critique but the 10:30 show

 httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar3RGAO7PA8

0m17s I need to get up there and smile first, then open my mouth, not just get up there and open my mouth 

1m25s Not enough emphasis on “HUGE TUBES” 

1m42s It should be “when she has no other options” not when “you have no other options” 

2m33s It’s always interesting when a quick comment back at the audience gets such a big reaction 

3m44s I should’ve waited a few seconds longer to get all the laughs 

4m55s I love how there’s one girl who keeps “awwwing” at everything 

6m07 I wanted to end here but it didn’t get the laugh I was expecting 

6m16s That didn’t help to close the set any stronger 

Overall: I started out pretty strong but the last few jokes didn’t go as well as I would’ve liked

This is back in NYC and I was the first comic up in the show

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VI2qJ1fsuyo 

0m37s There’s a better way to phrase this. Maybe “the first night was great, cause I KNEW I’d take her HOME” 

1m17s I’m not excitable enough when I say “tubes” 

1m40s More emphasis on the words “unemployment office” 

2m15s This took way too many words to get to the punch line 

2m50s If the first person hasn’t gotten the dog anything for Christmas, I should try to ask someone else, before saying they’re a terrible person. Then I can look back at them when I say “MOST people love their dogs” 

3m06s I love when audiences find it hysterical that they’ve ruined your joke 

4m07s I need to pause a second longer before “I don’t mean to give the game away” 

6m11s The full sentence, which cracked me up is “it’s federal mandate that every comic has to end their set with a joke about AIDS 

Overall: It was an okay set but the Tibet joke needs to be tightened. It’s not a great set when my biggest laugh was when I said “well this joke isn’t gonna work anymore”

I hosted this show, there were 8 people in the audience and the headliner was Artie Fletcher.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXa2bsblgqg 

1m12s I did a bunch of crowd work before getting into a joke 

3m30s Since I was hosting, I went back to crowd work after two minutes of jokes 

5m04s A cell phone went off as I was saying that, so I changed the tubes joke a little bit 

5m36s Yeah just between us… and the millions of people who could potentially see this video 

7m01s I like calling someone “good sir” instead of just “sir”, I should remember to that more often

8m12s My tonality didn’t change between “proud and vicious” and “I didn’t even get any snuggle head” it needs to change for the joke to have full effect 

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HISAbqmE6xE

This show only had me, a feature and a headliner. And I decided to do a quick joke in between the two. No real comments on it.

Overall: I think I did my job as host pretty well as I interacted with the audience and got them ready to laugh for the two performers. My favorite part was watching the headliner make a small corwd laugh a lot harder than I thought possible. I still got a long way to go to reach that level.

Another DC set, I think there were 6 to 8 people in the audience 

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6EyYj56OIA

2m07s I have a habit of not putting in full energy if nobody is laughing to start a set. So when I said “this is more interesting than my jokes” I meant it. I think the truth got a reaction 

3m14s The guy in the audience cracked me up 

3m38s Maybe I should just be a talk show host… 

5m10s Try to rephrase/shorten to “I’m not being cruel, this is the only way to tell if someone is a keeper” 

6m19s I meant it, and I don’t even smoke 

6m38s My eyes are looking down at the ground too much 

7m05s I should try throwing in the Lehman Brothers thing as an additional line to the pizza pot joke 

9m25s I think I’m actually picking up momentum as I go through the set 

9m35s There’s one guy who keeps saying “wow,” I don’t remember it at the time but he made me dislike him while I watched the video 

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bqr48feuF6E

0m25s And there goes my momentum 

0m43s I like how quitting got an additional laugh 

Overall: I started out weak, got strong in the middle and ended weak again. I think I did better once I spent some time interviewing the audience

This is back in DC.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMCPBMR5Oj4 

0m29s Kill the good looking Tom Cruise joke 

0m54s Throw in an “I get it” after the “Halloween costume” and try to reword it a little bit 

1m27s Previous comics and his friends made fun of him about this, so I called back to it. I’m not just picking on audience members for no reason — although the bigger a group, the more they love it when someone in their group gets picked on, when its in fun at least 

2m02s Add “and 30 seconds to escape” 

2m12s Get rid of the abandoned warehouse line 

3m19s Good job giving them a second to breathe 

3m53s Need more emphasis on the word “enslave” 

4m44s This whole joke should be tried much shorter: “I make decisions by playing rock paper scissor. I was a paper away from being a brain surgeon. And I was a scissor away from cutting myself” 

5m38s A little more energy on the “if you __” scenarios 

6m42s This was one of the best reactions to the “eat bros before ho’s” line 

7m20s Good job using the audience’s input to keep my joke going 

7m58s Decent call back to end it

Overall: I’m glad the call back is working to end the joke. And the newer jokes need to get tightened as usual. This is of course a lot more obvious after watching it.