Tag: Critiques

The Sunday writer’s mic

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGf3v0MphR8

3m30s Combine the cops and the mugger into one thing

Overall: Ok for a mic.

The 8pm Show

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVBG9byyvEE

1m53s Instead of just repeating “disappointdar” say “disappointdar works like this”

9m05s Nice to end a new joke on a decent laugh

Overall: Good set. Did some newer material that went over decently.

The 10pm show

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O98nzhrTCkI

0m25s Fingers on my left hand should be wiggling more

2m25s The super soft whisper gets a bigger laugh

4m38s My face should be looking up higher

5m10s Seem happier

5m48s The thesaurus joke needs to be cut or reworded

7m28s The actually love line isn’t needed to go into this, do it after the twice the neglect joke instead

8m48s This joke is still noticeably weaker than the first five minutes

Overall: Ok but not great. I did too many newer jokes in a row in the middle and ruined momentum.

The 8pm show for a smaller than usual audience

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVOPdBv81aE

4m05s I got way too distracted without making it funny

4m51s Smile a little more on the immigrant line

7m28s DVD line works better when I’m sad

Overall: Weak set, especially the second half. I should’ve used a few a more save lines or gone into crowd work earlier.

Late night music and comedy

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRUIdUtETgI

1m27s Change the delivery on the friends line

3m54s Stay pointing at/addressing one specific person for the propose line

8m40s Tighten the wording, or at least make it flow better

9m19s Don’t use bottle twice in the sentence, say liter the first time

10m24s Make the motion more obvious that I’m referring to my face

11m08s Try “they’re all smiling and happy, cause they just got my new DVD”

Overall: Great set of mostly new material, especially considering it was 2am.