Tag: Critiques

A late night prom show for high school kids

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F3rK6Jx_E0

0m08s Don’t start with calling out the shitty clap, unless there’s a better punch line

2m21s I could’ve been more conversational here, and asked if anyone was going to college cause they don’t wanna get their ass kicked

3m06s No need to say that, if I’m gonna go that way, I should say “I guess I can’t buy coke here”

4m43s I went into this a bit too much, no need for all this

5m13s Change “sometimes” to “I used to”

6m43s Not sure why this big punch line completely missed

7m24s Say “partners” not “hookups”

8m47s Me telling high school kids the website for escorts is funny, even if they didn’t laugh

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXGQDf0G66c

0m24s Don’t say that part

Overall: I got some laughs but I never got good laughter momentum and I called the crowd out too much on being in high school and possibly not having had some experiences (once would be too much, I did it two or three times)

An outdoor fundraiser show

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czp3RiZqepo

0m10s The comic before me stripped down to his underwear

0m22s That background sound is the rain, the people were under a tent

3m11s Good job holding for the laugh

4m46s Get rid of “opinion on anal” and just do the “spit or swallow”

5m18s Instead of “twenty bucks” say “a twenty”

5m23s Good job referencing the fund raiser

8m40s Don’t say Jewel two sentences in a row

9m21s It might be better worded “now we’re on a first class flight”

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPfOQbm_R0I

2m24s Didn’t need this last tag cause the joke went over well

2m52s Good quick reply

3m24s Awkward bail out of a joke, but at least I didn’t linger on it

Overall: Really solid set, I worked in a couple of lines about the specific fund raiser into my regular jokes, most all the jokes hit really strong and the ones that didn’t hit strong, I was able to keep going and get everyone back on track

An open mic

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XneAcqX_DCg

5m48s Keep the photo up by my chest as I do the crazed look

6m40s Don’t say “musician” again, just manager

7m23s Punch line is too wordy

9m03s Keep the improv phone lower so everyone can see my face

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYs37Emt3fI

Overall: Decent open mic set, I practiced a bunch of older stuff and worked out some new stuff

Hosting my show in Astoria

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5VyExyThfU

0m36s Decent off the cuff joke

1m25s Pause a half second longer before “not all the white ones…”

5m24s Try “hair lip” instead of “eye patch”

6m04s Instead of “her” say “my mom”

6m51s Instead of the cough, just point to whoever laughs loudest and go “I think we found our cokeheads”

8m12s Get rid of “wine” and the eucharist

8m45s When the music gets this loud, I should just start karaokeing

9m20s Pause for another second before saying “So I’m in the market…”

Part 2

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgTgN5hAtzk

1m16s Should’ve started doing this crowd work earlier in the set

Overall: Decent but I should’ve done a little more crowd work, especially towards the beginning, I should try to pace it like: joke, crowd, joke joke, crowd, joke joke joke, crowd

An afternoon open mic

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYzgpjaIK8E

0m38s Need a better setup to get the audience invested in a 3 minute long joke

2m10s This can be done a few less times, start the emphasis on single words right away

3m48s I’m pretty sure all the background noise is from outside the room, or else I would’ve addressed it

4m08s I guess I addressed it anyway

5m03s Don’t stop arm flailing, try doing it the whole act out

Overall: Working out newer jokes at an open mic, not horrible but not great