Performance Critique: May 16

MCing the Sunday Writers Mic

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RmbvK2TI7g

0m20s Slow down and sound more confused

0m32s Reword to “van full of kids”

0m41s Slow down!

0m51s Get rid of the bike messenger part

1m18s Kill international part

1m38s Kill the king cone part

2m20s Say “when you got singing kids with cell phones” instead

Overall: I worked out one new joke and can already see which parts need to go, I need to slow WAY down on this joke though and play up my confusion

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