Going in the middle of the 9pm show
httpv://youtu.be/Pl2OayZLNdI
2m07s It should be “he tells me” instead of “he goes”
2m17s It should be “movie watching” and no stutter
3m21s Might wanna cut the bottom rung line, or put it after the protesting part
5m27s Drop both hands to the side
Overall: Solid but unspectacular set, slightly better considering I did a bunch of newer material.
A 7:30 show
httpv://youtu.be/qNtv6ElEVbY
0m37s This used to hit a lot harder, rewatch old videos and see what I’ve changed
0m50s Slow it down a little and visualize the shoes
5m30s Add “and keep it positive” in the setup
6m06s It’s better to do this right after a mom impression
Overall: Solid set with an applause break in the middle but some of the punch lines could’ve hit harder.
The 8pm show
httpv://youtu.be/gh6Tr0TpkBQ
0m27s Take a slight pause after “junkie”
1m17s Nice little improvised line
2m35s The kid was too young to point at, find someone who looks 25 or over
3m08s It should be “King’s Palace”
3m27s Take a slight pause before “phone charger”
6m33s Not sure if I need “full contact sport”
6m53s Make it two hundred thousand instead of twenty
7m03s I heard talking but shouldn’t have addressed it as it wasn’t that loud
7m30s Not even sure what he said
8m28s Decent job working my way back into the material
8m40s Should be smiling more during this part
9m46s I missed the line of “maybe I’ll get married at 41 when I should be dead anyway”
10m00s Shouldn’t have gone into that bit after the interruption
10m21s Could’ve asked if she had to see any family
10m49s Checks are dropping
11m13s Make a sentence, and I forgot to do the grandpa criticizing me part
11m52s Don’t say dip twice in a row
11m56s Don’t use the word “sad” let them figure it out
13m53s Suicide then murder should be the setup
Overall: It went a lot better than I remembered it going, and the interaction with the heckler seemed smoother than I remembered it going. I should’ve still been even gentler on the first response. Set got weaker at the end due to checks dropping.
The 8pm show
httpv://youtu.be/2UmFGwm7NbM
0m17s Tighten those first two sentences
0m32s Pause before “bullshit”
1m49s Say the line smoother
2m28s Make the second one “Halo” or “call of duty” instead of repeating Madden
2m54s Hit the line stronger without jumbling words
3m33s Pause after “12th century” as that seems to the laugh line
5m24s Nice job being in the room and noticing that
6m48s Add “it’s just a hunch” or “I’d actually guess Denny’s”
7m09s Six pack is funnier than twenty four pack
7m47s It should be “and you’re horny” not “or you’re horny”
9m15s Emphasize “AND”
Overall: Great set. I did a lot of new and newer material and it went over really well. I just gotta smooth out my words in a few places.
Going up around 2am on a music and comedy mic
httpv://youtu.be/hvN87eWN2Sc
1m21s Change up his voice a bit more
2m21s Leave it as “you do” no need to rephrase to “you do”
3m30s Funny improvised line about the sick day, but should probably cut or rework most of this bit
4m39s Make this a conversation with an actual person
4m44s Give the immigrants an accent
6m02s It actually did completely miss and needs a rewrite
8m01s Try yawning on the “you’re so tired” line
8m53s I could’ve improvised a “she wants me to end this too” line based on the material I was doing
9m05s Change “modern art” to “your masterpiece”
11m04s Cut out the word “kitchen”
Overall: The two newer jokes were kinda weak but the Blade bit at the end went well.
