Category: Comedy

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Dumpster Diving – The Music Video

I wrote this song based on the time I was doing comedy until 2am every Friday and Saturday night in NYC. By the time I’d get to the bars with my comedian friends, the cream of the crop was long gone. So we started to affectionately refer to going out this late as “Dumpster Diving”.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MD96Ccv7mds

I apologize for my lack of musical skills in both singing and background music. At least now you know my joke of “I got into stand up cause I can’t share the spot light, but I can’t sing or dance. So it was either this or tennis… And I can’t play tennis drunk!” is based on truth.

If you can actually sing, create a cooler video and/or record real background music and are interested in remixing this, please get in touch with me.

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Performance Critique: Oct 24

This is me MCing a show I produced at Caltech.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFt_85AHpgk

0m25s Interesting that 80% of the audience didn’t clap for either option

1m24s I need to look at the space on stage where my mom character was for that punch line

1m52s I should’ve done a little more crowd work before going into another joke

2m18s Better to end this line on the punch word: “it’s a joke ever since the deli told him ‘you’re fired’”

2m27s Shocker: the public school kids line doesn’t work at a private university

2m45s Notice The audience didn’t laugh at “have you looked in the mirror lately” but laughed at “I am way more likely to get molested.” I’m trying to figure out if these two lines show that you should keep adding punches to a “meaner” joke until they laugh or if it shows that it’s better to make jokes at your expense.

2m58s This would’ve been a good moment for crowd work

3m25s First time I didn’t get a good laugh from that. This joke works best when I pick a girl from a group of four or five friends. I picked someone on the side where there were only nine people and she was with her boyfriend. I also probably shouldn’t have picked the most attractive person in the audience.

3m36s This is the new version of the tubes joke as I decided to get rid of the second line about “triple layered chocolate suffle cake”, move the third line to the second, and add a third one. All three punches missed so bad that I decided to skip the “he just gave you a look like, your tubes are kinda large” line.

3m42s Good save

3m51s Proof the model joke works well even in the middle of my set, doesn’t have to be my opener.

4m27s All 75 people are completely sober

4m35s This is always a risky joke to do, especially early in a set

5m27s Add “you look like” before “you might know the slogan”

5m57s I noticed that “nature’s draino” gets a groan, so I now admit to going too far, and then go further. It usually works better than here.

6m18s I like the morning after pill joke but need to figure out a way to get the audience to like it

6m25s I exaggerated his answer on purpose

6m38s I’m not kidding

6m47s I meant to do this joke before the morning after pill joke

7m39s That’s funny (although mean), even if they didn’t laugh

7m55s I improvised the “branching out of the Caltech dating pool”… I should try a similar tag in the future like “I’m just trying to branch out of the usual dating pool”

8m04s Rare that this didn’t get a laugh

8m32s Calling people out works better if I look at them during the joke

8m45s No reason to share my name again

Part 2 of my opening set

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dtb4h-uS_Yw

0m32s Who gets married from a Denny’s date?

0m56s I need to make this punch line clearer

1m38s None of the small punch lines worked on the way, but this one got a response

1m49s If I’m gonna say what someone looks like, I should follow it up. A “can you get me tickets to the price is right?” joke would’ve gone well here.

This is me doing material between comics

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9qzD3oHfkA

0m15s There were enough people here to volunteer an answer, but I decided not to push an interaction and just went into the joke

0m55s Maybe I should do this joke more often, as this line gets a great laugh

More material between comics

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8N0069TM_g

0m43s Try “that is so art deco” instead of “he is so art deco”

1m05s I got the lines backwards, it should’ve been “most of you are like, woah he wasn’t lying, that IS his job”

1m27s The line should’ve been “at the Econmetrica convention”

More time between comics

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4T-w4QbTCY

0m11s Referencing his joke

0m22s I hate hearing “awws” on this joke

0m31s The aww train continues

0m45s I didn’t think this was a mean joke until 30 seconds of awws and silence… I need to figure out how to turn that to laughter

0m55s At least the last line got a laugh, if it hadn’t, I would’ve gone into another joke before bringing up the next comedian

Last joke between comics

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXGSphlmG1g

0m14s I should’ve suggested a costume for him

0m20s My attempt at a segue

Overall: As a show, it was a great success. I did my job as an MC by warming up the crowd as they were laughing hard at all the comedians I brought up. That said, I could’ve done a lot more crowd work, and the crowd work I did needed to last for 2-3 exchanges at a time instead of a one liner and back to material. I also need to learn to be funnier with crowd work. Also, I only had three solid laughs where 90% or more of the audience was with me (“Igor likes this”, “it costs money” and “you must love sweaters”). As the MC, you’re not expected to kill with laughter but I should be getting more laughs.

Also, I felt that the audience perceived a lot of my jokes as “mean.” I can think of three ways to get past this: 1) Work on my stage persona so that I can get away with more mean jokes. 2) Change the order of the jokes where I do more self deprecating stuff upfront or 3) Somehow convey that I’m kidding, or that it’s okay to laugh (which is part of stage persona I guess). Most likely it’s a combination of these three ideas and other things I’m not yet aware of.

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So You’ve Been Laid Off, Now What? (Storyboard Version)

I previously published the script for this sketch and after failing at organizing a video shoot, I decided to go ahead and create a mock-up version using photos.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhN7O3AO-Cg

While I think this version is funny, I think it could be much funnier if shot using real video footage. I have an HD camera but need a few actors, a narrator (I’m no Mr. Moviefone!) and someone better versed at editing. Contact me if you’re interested in helping out.

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Book Review: Chocolate, Please

Disclaimer: I received a complimentary review copy of this book. I’d like to think it didn’t influence my review, but who knows. (If you’d like me to review something comedy related on my site, contact me.)

chocolate

“Chocolate, Please” by Lisa Lampenelli is unlike many books by comics I’ve recently read. Instead of taking her best hour of stand up, adding another two hours of second rate jokes and typing them up, Lampenelli takes the reader on a voyage of her struggles with weight, food and men, and the rehab clinics she attended because of them. This isn’t to say the book isn’t funny, it is, but this book stands on its own without you needing to be a fan of the writer or her comedy beforehand. (I was only vaguely familiar with her myself.)

Being a comedian I wanted to read more about Lampenelli’s comedy career struggles and less about her weight struggles. But then again, that seems to be her point: You can be really successful in one part of your life and a complete failure in other parts, and the success doesn’t fully matter until you’ve dealt with the failing parts. Along that train of thought, the line “As I believe is true in anything and especially comedy, all you need is one person who believes” struck me as especially poignant.

When Lisa does mention comedy, she hits the nail on the head with such observations as, “Comedy is a strange profession. People who have been onstage two times in their lives have business cards that say “Comedian.” Therefore, a comic’s entire career is focused on separating himself from the delusional wackos.” Other good observations include, “Comics who stand at the bar after their sets are either drunks or trying to get laid”, “When you’re an adult, it’s easy to ruin someone’s life. But when you can do it as a kid – that’s a gift” and “Our entire economic system is based on people succeeding just to stick it up the ass of people who were mean to them in high school.”

While I enjoyed reading the book, I would’ve liked it more without the last section, which drops her story and goes into random jokes and musings. (Although if you’re already a Lampenelli fan, you’ll probably like that section.)

Overall: This is an above average book in the comedy genre because it’s honest and follows an actual storyline. Read this book if you’re  struggling with relationships and/or self image, or if you like a good “hero’s journey” type of autobiography. This also makes for a great gift if someone is just getting out of, or on their way to, rehab.

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Pro Talk: Becoming a Full Time Comedian

I recently caught up with Clayton Fletcher to get his thoughts on the process of becoming a professional comedian.

claytonClayton Fletcher is a national headliner who performs all over the USA in various clubs and colleges. He has been seen on MTV, Sex & the City, and Rikki Lake. His live comedy show, The Clayton Fletcher Show, takes place every Friday and Saturday at 8PM at New York Comedy Club. For more, visit www.claytonfletcher.com

1. Can you discuss the transition to professional comedian? Is it a gradual process where you make more money each year until you can start doing it full time or is it more like a “zero to sixty” process?

Becoming a professional comedian is definitely a gradual process. I remember the first time I got paid I made $50 for a twenty-minute set in a restaurant. I only had twelve minutes of material so I tried doing crowd work for theother eight. It was the second-hardest fifty bucks I ever earned.

After that restaurant show I didn’t make another dime from comedy for about a year. But that little taste of getting paid drove me to work harder almost as much as bombing at my first professional show did. It doesn’t happen overnight but it does happen.

2. I’ve heard that most of the money is in road work / college work and not from working the clubs in NYC or LA. Is this true? How big is the difference?

Oh, definitely. If you are not a superstar comedian like Chris Rock or Lewis Black the payscale is much lower in the two major markets. The reason is quite simple: the law of supply and demand. If someone offers me $100 for a spot in New York and I demand $125 they can just hang up the phone and call one of the other six million comics and offer him or her the hundred. In Flint, Michigan, I am usually the only comedian in town when I show up so it is easier for me to set the price. Supply in New York is at such a surplus that if half the comics moved to L.A. today, the competition for every spot would still be fierce.

Although if that happened I would not mind at all…

3. Besides performing, what are the various (but related) ways a comedian can try to make money? Are these other streams significant?

The first other significant revenue stream that comes to mind is writing. I have written for film and television, usually as a “punch-up” artist. Punch-up just means that the script is complete except it could be funnier, so they hire comedians and comedy writers to try to add some more funny moments, to punch it up! Typically comics who do punch-up do not get writing credit but the money is often about what you would make on a weekend of performing.

I have also written for corporate projects such as award ceremonies, ad campaigns, and in-house films. Obviously the rates for anything in the corporate world are always higher since a company that is hiring a comedian as a consultant can afford to compensate him. When these opportunities come up, I am happy to be a sellout!

Other ways to parlay your comedy skills include doing commercials or voice-overs, working as a live event host, and teaching. I find that my comedy background gives me a huge edge in all of these endeavors as well. So often on a commercial audition they want me to improvise, and the comedy skills really come into play although stand-up in particular does not.

The other side-business I must mention is producing. There are countless opportunities in New York for self-driven comedians to take responsibility for booking a club on a certain night and then putting a show together. It is a tremendous amount of work (finding comedians, promoting, filling seats, finding a host, negotiating with headliners) but someone skilled in these areas can make a good living doing just that if (s)he wants to. In fact, many comics I started with nine years ago are now full-time comedy producers in New York who hardly ever get onstage themselves. Personally, my need to entertain people is so great that this path would never work for me. I would be like the alcoholic who owns a bar. But for them it has become a niche so I am happy they found their path.

4. At what point do you think someone should quit their day job?

Moving to full-time is a very difficult choice. For most it is terrifying. Once you quit that job, you lose your steady income, your health insurance, and the respect of your parents. I have never had a full-time job so I have no idea what it is like to have any of those things anyway. But if a comic is hungry and her act (not to mention her budget) shows that she is ready to take the training wheels off, I usually advise her to go for it! If things do not go according to plan then she can always hit up monster.com later. A good guideline is to walk away from the desk once you are making (or think you can make) at least 50% more from comedy than you were at your regular job. If this sounds high, remember that being self-employed is very expensive as no human resources department will show up to take care of your basic needs.

5. I read Norm McDonald earns $40,000 to headline a weekend in Vegas. (He then proceeds to gamble away $50,000.) What’s the highest headliner fee you’ve heard about?

I have heard that one A-list celebrity comic earns over $200,000 per corporate personal appearance. Although in these times of corporate scrutiny I would imagine those days are over.

6. I’ve also seen a “headliner” get $60 to do a 45 minute set (in Virginia). What’s the lowest fee you’ve heard? Is there a “standard” rate?

That $60 you just mentioned is an insultingly low price for a road headliner. Hey, who books that gig? Can I get his information? What, I like Virginia…

There is no standard rate but generally comics have a bottom line. Kidding aside, I know how much I would charge to do 45 in the South and every comic has his own number in mind. But it is almost like the number of girls you slept with: you keep it a secret and you might embellish one way or the other depending on who you’re talking to!

7. Anything else about the financial aspects of comedy you think aspiring comedians should know?

Well, I come from a theatrical background and a show business family so my attitude was always if I do what I love, the money will come. Now that I am in my thirties I can tell you that such romantic idealism is for suckers! The money only comes when you work extremely hard at your craft AND your business. I made a lot of mistakes in the financial area when I started out, viewing myself as an ar-teest. But now I see myself as a performer AND a shrewd businessman. And that is the reality for anyone trying to make a living as a comedian.

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